Wednesday, November 29, 2006

What do I Have in Common with Sally?

I'm a Ford Mustang!





You're an American classic -- fast, strong, and bold. You're not snobby or pretentious, but you have what it takes to give anyone a run for their money.


"Take the Which Sports Car Are You? quiz.

Tuesday, November 28, 2006

Blatant Excuse(s)

So my posting has lagged a bit - life happens. And while there is a valid argument that blogging is exactly for that purpose, to chronicle life when it happens, sometimes it just isn't possible.

Home ownership has taken its toll, yet again. My garage door is a recent cause of dismay. Turns out some of the bolts on the hinges that hold the panels together were loose causing one of the panels to misalign. This in turn cause the door to jam on the way down and basically blow out the motor on the garage door opener. Also, one of the door springs snapped and in the process, bent a pulley. So research, shopping, aggravation, and about $300 later, its all better. On the plus side, the new garage door opener is a gem - opens the door in about a second or two and quietly to boot.

This morning I await the "Pest Control Experts" to hopefully not provide me with dreadful news. Last week I was outside the garage an notice a "nugget" in the wood on one of the moldings. I poked at it and it basically disintegrated leaving a gaping hole uncovering an insect of sorts. I thought it best to have a termite inspection and check for the possibility of carpenter ants. We tend to have a horrible ant problem when winter changes over to spring and spring into summer. SO I need to get that all sorted out and pray that there isn't ridiculous amounts of wood damage that needs costly repairs.

My cat is cute like crazy but is one nutty little dude. Peace for now...

Friday, November 24, 2006

"Black Friday"

I've seen several mentions referring to today as "Black Friday". Well, it has nothing to do with the stock market crashing so it must be the horrible traffic as a result of psychotic shoppers (and I guess some who are perfectly normal). One of the local sales flyers we received this week advertised Wal-Mart's "early-bird" specials available from 5am to 11am. 5am? 5am!

¡Aye Car├ámba!

I vivdly recall the news stories of last year's early bird specials, which involved numerous people getting trampled so they can buy one of a handful of DVD players for $29. Risk death to save $50 - not a good trade-off. Anyway, there's a reason God created the Internets - no risk of being trampled!

In other news, Thanksgiving at the Jeffrey's for a fourth year was terrific as ususal. Good food, good people, and good fun. Thanks for opening your home and family to us once more.

Finally, as we enter this holiday season - do what makes you happy, but do it safely. Please so not get trampled.

Monday, November 20, 2006

Playstation Freakazoids

Perhaps you've heard the recent stories of people camped out for days in front of stores so they could be the first to own a Playstation 3 video game system. It was really odd to see this behavior on television, but last Thursday when I went to Target at lunch time to pick up some Christmas gifts, I actually saw with my own eyes the tent loads of completely insane young boys and girls surrendering days of their life for a stupid video game.

I've done some stupid things in my life. In all fairness, maybe it's my age and place in life that have me so darn puzzled - but I just don't see how or why someone would freely give of that kind of time for something so meager.

At target, there were about half a dozen tents or so, but what I thought was disturbing, is the sign right ourside the door and just in front of the line that read, "NO WAITING, JOBS AVAILABLE TODAY!" I just wanted to shake them and tell them to walk their dumb asses 20 feet inside the store and fill out a job application so they can go home, get a shower and some rest, and get to the store bright and early and get an employee discount on the stupid game.

Well, while I may not understand it, I am over it. What follows is the text that appeared at the bottom of an ebay ad for one of these elusive systems and was the sellers story as to how he ended up actually getting a unit. As Ripley says...."Believe it, or not..."

i went out wednesday afternoon to the local walmart to start camping out. when i got there, there were already 12 people ther so i got in line being number 13. i talked around and found out the first 6 people there had been there since monday, total hardcore nerds all planning to keep them. bragging about how only they should get the system since theyve been there the longest. how they are so dedicated and how if you dont want to do the time, you shouldnt get a system. generally being complete assholes. good for them. we had a hours to pass so we became friends and played some cards and whatnot. the 6 guys in front kept to themselves and didnt associate with the rest of us. we were cool with each other leaving the line to get food, bathroom, smoke, etc since we all knew each other and as long as they were back in 30 minutes. i was about to leave to go buy some KFC for a good number of us and when i stepped out of line, one of the nerds shouted that if i left, i would lose my spot. the other guys told him that they were vouching for me and that i was just getting food but those 6 assholes didnt care. they said i leave, i lose my spot and that was the rules and they would call the manager (they had his number) to come out and enforce it. i said whatever and stayed in line. a few hours later, the manager came out and told everyone that there were only going to be SEVEN available. they have them in their store and theyre not getting anymore. he told the people after # 7 they should leave if they wanted to not waste their time. me being number 13 should have left but i didnt, i wanted to stick around for a little bit more. everyone else left except me and the 7 other people that were getting it for sure. so the day goes on and i try to make friends with the nerds. i play mario kart on the ds with them and talk to them about the games they were getting. about an hour or 2 later, i tell im gonnna head home since im 8 in line and theres only 7 ps3s. one of them made some stupid joke about if i leave the line then i aint getting back in!! har har. so as im about to leave, i tell them im going to the vons next door and if any of them wanted any food or coffee and id bring it back to them. one of them said yea and all the rest like sheep followed and said yes too. they were gonna give me money but i told them it was on me since theyve been out here since monday. the 7th guy in line wanted some food and coffee and i told him id buy some for him also. so i go to vons and buy 8 coffees, some food, and some x-lax laxatives. i bring it to my car and put some laxatives in 6 of the coffees and seperate them from mine and #7s. i pull back to walmart and bring all the drinks and food upfront. i give #7 his stuff and then the coffees with laxatives to the 6 nerds annd wish them good luck and go back to my car. i park it around the corner so i can still see them. about 30 minutes later, #2 and 3 in line get up and it seemed like they were yelling to the other nerds. they both ran into walmart. seconds later (i guess all nerds have the same biology) #5 gets up and runs across the parking lot and into the trees and bushes somewhere. #1 is scrounging for this portapotty type thing he'd brought with him but he is squirting everywhere and all over his pants and their sleeping bags. he runs into walmart. at this time, i start my car and drive back to the walmart to claim my spot in line. when i get there #4 and 6 are gone but i dont know where. #7 is laughing his ass off so hard and i just smile at him. i call up 5 of the other people that i had made friends with that were in line with me ( i had their phone numbers cause i was gonne buy to food for everyone) and told them to get back to the walmart ASAP and get in line. Meanwhile, me and #7 threw all their shit into the parking lot and i claimed my spot as #1, him as #2. 4 and the people i had called arrived and got in line just as 1 of the nerds came running back and got #7. he started yelling saying they need their spots back. we all told them to fuck off, out of spot, out of line. it was all of us against him so he didnt say shit. the nerds came back and tried to start some shit but we just laughed, we told them it was their rule and to go fuck themselves and clean the shit off their pants. the called security and security came. security man was like WTF is that fuckin smell and looked at the nerds with shit all of them and kicked them off the grounds screaming LMAO. so that is how i got my ps3.

Sunday, November 19, 2006

Wekend Memery

Since very few drift on over on the weekend anyway, I thought I'd do this meme I snatched and spice it up a bit. Some of the answers are true, some are false, and some could be true. All are stupid and several are vulgar.

What’s in the glove box of your car?
A couple of used tissues, coffee stirrers, and a ticket stub from a Barry Manilow concert.

Favorite classes in college (or high school):
In college, my favorite thing was doing my radio show. In high school, it was Math (cause of my dorkiness).

Shampoo brand:
Pantene.

Favorite piece of furniture you own:
Shall we call it a swing?

Idea of a really good first date:
Beer and Sex…no names involved and no chance of a second date.

Favorite fruit:
Barry Manilow (see first question)

Pick a passage from a favorite book:
“The End” – found in just about every book.

What would you eat for dinner if it were your last night on earth?
Peter Luger’s.

Free Will or Destiny?
Since nothing is ever Free, especially Will, I’ll take destiny for 600 Alex.

What would you sing at karaoke?
A song.

Sweater or Sweatshirt?
Sweatshirt

Paris, NYC, Tokyo, or Rio de Janeiro?
NYC

What do you wear to bed usually?
sweats and a t-shirt (socks optional)

If you dyed your hair, what color would you dye it?
Gray

If you went back to school, what would you study?
Veterinary Medicine.

Gum or mints?
How dare you make me choose!

Recurring nightmares?
Yes.

Age & location of first kiss?
17, on the lips.

Describe your favorite pair of shoes:
Life is too short to play favorites though I am partial to my slippers.

What movie/tv character do you feel like you relate to most?
Fish (how’s that for a reference!)

First CD purchase:
The Bangles – Different Light (Because Joe Jackson was out of stock). My first LP was Book of Dreams by the Steve Miller Band (and I still have it 30 or so years later)

First concert:
Billy Joel

Do you like camping?
Only if Barry Manilow is coming along and there's at least a chance of some reach around action.

If you were doomed to be mauled to death by an animal, what animal would you prefer that to be?
The one who can do the job in the shortest time possible.

Do you/would you own a gun?
Never.

What religion would you like to know more about:
Islam.

Favorite food as a kid:
Pizza

How many languages do you speak?
None

If you were a natural disaster, would you be a tornado, hurricane, or earthquake?
Whatever happened to the old Tsunami?

If you could make one state in the US just go away, which state would that be?
Hands down, Texas.

How many prescriptions do you take?
None for the moment.

Lake or Ocean?
Ocean.

What is the worst lie you’ve ever told to get out of work, (and don’t say you’ve never lied to get out of work, because that my friend is a lie and you know it)?
I once slammed my nads against the bar on a bike that was way to big for me. I stopped short, next thing I knew I was waking up with a bloddy ball sack. (Nice imagery huh?) That really dosen't answer the question though, does it? Ok, here's one..."Sorry that I can't make it to work today, I spent the entire night listening to every known recording of Barry Manilow and I am just too emotionally bewildered to leave my bed."

Do you carry a backpack, a satchel or “man bag”, tote bag, brief case, or a backpack on wheels?
I’d call it something of a satchel.

Have you ever been arrested/cited for anything other than traffic violations?
Jumped a turnstile in the subway in NYC when in High School

Would you ever move for/with a significant other?
Not easily – needs to be a terrific payoff

What was the weirdest thing you had to dissect for biology?
The teacher. Wait, that wasn't required.

Would you ever consider spending some time at a nudist colony?
Not a fucking chance (unless by some miracle, attractive people actually went – and while it may be a shallow response, you’re thinking the same thing but I had the guts to say it. That is, you’re thinking the same thing unless you are one of the fugly ones who go to nudist colonies).

Best thing you can cook?
I’m a terrific cook.

If you were going to donate 1000 dollars to a charity, what would that be?
If it were today, the Katrina Relief Effort.

All Funked Up

That's right, I am in a major funk and it's not just any one thing, it's a compilation of many things. I am mad, sad, and everything in between and all around.

Amongst the disarray, a friend was recently diagnosed with cancer and is about to begin the fight of her life.

I noticed some wood damage in the garage area and fear that there may be either termites or carpenter ants.

My garage door opener died! The spring snapped. I called a repair company and the costs of a service call and repair was less than $100 shy of a brand new unit including installation. So, I went off to Lowe's and bought a new unit and now I am awaiting them to handle the install - in the meantime, my poor car must live in the cold outdoors.

I'm gonna crawl back in my shell for now...

Wednesday, November 15, 2006

Random Ramblings on a Wednesday in November

The Boston Red Sox have paid a reported $51.1 million dollars for the exclusive rights to negotiate with a Japanese superstar pitcher. I guess if they sign the guy, which I don't believe could happen for less than an additional $40 million bucks I can only guess that hot dogs are going up to around $12 bucks at Fenway.

According to Associated Press, "In a new TV interview and book, O.J. Simpson discusses how he would have committed the slayings of his ex-wife and her friend 'if he did it.'" So, thanks to the press, O.J. is actually going to elaborate on how he actually committed two murders and instead of going to jai, he'll get paid. In the words of Borat, "U.S. and A is great country!"

Speaking of Borat, I saw the movie last Friday and highly recommend it. It's one of the funniest films I've seen in a while despite the shock value of a certain scene involving nudity and wrestling.

You gotta love the whole "Fed-Ex" moniker given to K-Fed after the Britney divorce announcement. Turns out that now K-Fed is "threatening" to sell some home-made sex tapes…I agree with Howard Stern's take, Britney should release them for free on the Internet. They aren't going to hurt her one bit (see Paris Hilton) and it'll diffuse his ability to capitalize on them.

Someone actually greeted me this morning by saying, "Gee Chris, you look so tired." That wasn't fun to hear.

I think Snickers bars are good, but highly overrated. Give me a Mars bar (or the comparable Snickers Almond) any day.

Later.

Monday, November 13, 2006

Things That Make You Go Hmmm...

The letter that follows was sent to me by someone else in the education business. On of the interesting things being a teacher is the unusual, let's call them reasons, that a student might offer as to why they are unable to complete an assignment or keep up with the work, etc. For me, there's always a part of me that brings me back to my days as a student and some of the doozies that I came up with.

However, this particular one is of a completely different breed. You'll see:

Dear Professor So and So,

I am still having a difficult time with the landlord and a neighbor next door who also builds computers and is an alcoholic. He appears to have all my software registration numbers and even bought the same camera I have. I believe he is getting or was getting paid off by a business rival who I reported to the government about a robbery. I cannot get a correct disk image. The computer is constantly connected to an antenna, I have repeatedly asked the landlord to disconnect it over the course of ten years, but he will not. No legal firm seems to understand what is going on. The former housing authority landlord was fired for mismanagement of funds after I complained about him for five years. The police have no knowledge of what I'm talking about and will not help. I live less than 100 yds from a wifi hot spot. There is no way out, I feel like a hostage, and cannot move due to waiting lists that are years long, I've had six hard drives destroyed, by this antenna, and even ComTel(formerly MediaTel)knows about the antenna. They will not disconnect it, because they say the landlord has jurisdiction over it and the landlord will not disconnect it because the custodians (who worked for the former corrupt housing authority) believe Comcast has jurisdiction. The logic is cyclical. I cannot write a program without the alcoholic next door not understanding it. I don't know who to talk to.

Sincerely,Person in Need of Assistance

Saturday, November 11, 2006

What American Accent do I Have? etc.

Joy "stole" this from someone and I in turn snatched it from her. It's been a while since I did one of these quizzie thingies. The result is accurate which is modestly impressive - fo shizzle. For those of you who don't know, I am originally from New York City and for the last 9+ years have been living in Eastern Massachusettes about 25 miles west of Boston.


What American accent do you have?
Your Result: The Northeast
Judging by how you talk you are probably from north Jersey, New York City, Connecticut or Rhode Island. Chances are, if you are from New York City (and not those other places) people would probably be able to tell if they actually heard you speak.
Philadelphia
The Inland North
The Midland
The South
Boston
The West
North Central
What American accent do you have?
Take More Quizzes


So, then I took this other quiz, "How Massachusetts are you?" I thought it would be interested to see how I've adapted to the culture here after more than 9 years. Here is the result...

Dude! You're 96% from Massachusetts!
Dude! Me and Sully and Fitzie and Sean are gonna hit Landsdowne tonight after the game, hang out at the Beerworks. I'll pick you up at the Coop at 6.

How Massachusetts are you?
Quiz Created on GoToQuiz


So, I guess I've adapted somewhat. While my speaking voice is predominantly New York, I do comprehend the "Boston accent" fairly well and as much as I hate to admit it, a word or two creeps through like that on a rare occasion.

Friday, November 10, 2006

Election Reflection

I wanted a few days to pass so that I could have some time to process all that as happened politically in our nation and in my state this week. I'll leave the national stuff for another time (maybe) but I do want to speak a bit about the governor-elect of Massachusetts, Deval Patrick.

While he earned my vote, he did just that, he earned it. Early on I was high on another candidate and literally a few days before the primary, Deval won my vote. I look back on the enitrety of his campaign and the true grassroots movement he created and am in total awe. While I will always have an air of skepicism anout any politician, Deval really does appear to be the real deal.

What follows is the transcript of Deval Patrick's acceptance speech which is easily amongst the five best speeches I have ever heard. Enjoy...

Thank you, thank you all. You better believe we can. Thank you all.
Today, November 7, 2006, the people of Massachusetts chose by a decisive margin to take their government back.
This was not a victory just for me. This was not a victory just for Democrats. This was a victory for hope.
And we won it the old-fashioned way – we earned it. Nearly two years ago, we started on this journey, and by coming to you, where you live and work, by listening to you, by showing that we could disagree with each other without being disagreeable, by asking you to put your cynicism down, by refusing to build myself up by tearing anybody else down, by challenging you to see your stake in your neighbor’s dreams and struggles as well as your own, we built what history will record is the broadest and best-organized grassroots organization this Commonwealth has ever seen.
Now I ask you to look around. Look around, especially those of you who have never been a part of a campaign. Every kind of person is here. You come from every corner of the Commonwealth. You come from great wealth and no wealth. You walk and you use wheelchairs. Democrats and Independents and Republicans are here. You are liberal and moderate and conservative.
You see in common how broken our civic life and how fractured our communities are. You see in common that the poor are in terrible shape and the middle class are one month away from being poor. And you know that government by gimmick and sound bite isn’t working. You know that we deserve better and we are better than that. And for a chance at a better and more hopeful future, you built bridges some of you never thought could be built across all kinds of differences -- and then you crossed them.
You are business executives looking for a better margin and artists looking to be valued. You are college kids in search of a career and high school drop-outs looking for a way forward. You are young mothers trying to balance work and child care and grandmothers trying to hold on to the family home. You are farmers and fishing families wondering whether there is a future in livelihoods that built this Commonwealth and union members wondering why there is so little work when there is so much to do. And the magic is that you have come together not just for your own dreams and your own aspirations, but for each others’.
This has never been my campaign. It has always been yours. The real heroes here are the thousands of you, here and at home, many who have never been involved before in a political campaign, who set aside what you were doing to get involved, who confronted your despair about the direction our Commonwealth has been heading in, and decided to take responsibility for her future.
You are the young man from Boston who took the midnight bus from college in New York to be at the polls to vote this morning, then hopped on the next bus back to New York so that he could be back in time for his internship. You are the mother who thanked me this morning for running a campaign her kids could watch and be proud of. You are the retiree who told me the other day that this campaign changed her life. You are the homeless man who figured out how to register and vote without an address, because he did not want to be left out again. You are the venture capitalist in the office tower who organized other VCs to help, and the cleaning crew who stopped us in the lobby on the way in to say, 'I'm with you, too.' You are the new citizen who says with such pride that you cast your first vote for Tim and me. You are the tired and frustrated public official, who just got your second wind. You are every Black man, woman and child in Massachusetts and America, and every other striver of every race and kind, who is reminded tonight that the American Dream is for you, too.
You are the ones who transformed this from a political campaign to a movement for change, and I am honored and awed by what you have done. You made a claim on history, and I thank you for letting me be a part of that.
I have been blessed with the best campaign manager and the best strategist on the planet in John Walsh and Doug Rubin. I have also been blessed with an extraordinary staff, who stand with me tonight as they have for many, many months now. I have been blessed with an amazing running mate in Tim Murray. And I have been blessed with a family stronger than steel, especially my wife, Diane.
I have also been blessed many times over by the people of Massachusetts. A people so proud, so optimistic, so practical, so hopeful. I'm not forgetting Ron Bell, relax. I'm not forgetting you, either, and I never will. The people of Massachusetts are so proud, so optimistic, so practical, so hopeful. A people of ingenuity and drive and grit and determination. A people of fundamental civility and warmth. A people from a tradition of high standards and high expectations. This is the character of the people of Massachusetts. This is the character you reflected in this campaign. And these are the people I am honored to serve come January as your Governor.
Unfortunately, there is unpleasantness in any political campaign. This one had perhaps more than its share. But let’s put all that behind us. See, that's yesterday. I am not here to serve as governor of the winners. I am here to serve as governor of the whole Commonwealth. So, just as you have built bridges across differences to create this grassroots movement, go build bridges with supporters of the competing campaigns. They are our neighbors, too. They are a part of this community, too. They have a stake in a fair and purposeful government, just like the rest of us.
Let me start by congratulating Kerry Healey, Christy Mihos and Grace Ross. They had the courage to put their ideas and their vision on the line, and subject it to scrutiny and critique. They deserve our gratitude and respect for the thoughtful contributions they each made to the public discourse.
Let us also thank Mitt Romney for his service. (boos from the crowd) No, wait a minute. That is not what we are about. We have had our differences, but every resident of this state owes a debt of gratitude for anyone willingness to serve, and I thank him for him for that service and the accomplishments of his administration, and I look forward to working with him and his team to ensure a smooth transition.
Tonight we celebrate, but soon our thoughts must turn to governing. We are charged with an awesome responsibility. We have a mandate to revive this economy, to assure excellence in every public school and college, and to deliver on the promise of decent health care. We have a mandate to make the streets safe and housing more affordable. We have a mandate to get the Big Dig right and to help the creative economy flourish. We have a mandate to change the way we do business on Beacon Hill and to keep the grassroots alive and growing. And that mandate is Commonwealth-wide, and it comes from everyone here and everyone in the Commonwealth in search of a reason to hope.
You know change won’t come in a flash. You know that it will take focus and commitment and patience. But you also know that government by gimmick and photo op and sound bite has failed us. Do not expect more of that from me.
What you should expect is that I will work as hard and as smart as I can; that I will listen closely and carefully; that I will be straight with you, as I expect you to be with me; that I will make mistakes, as humans sometimes do, and that I will learn from them when I do; that I will bring every day the best that I have and the best that I am.
And what I expect from you is that you keep this renewed sense of community alive; that you see your stake in each other every day; that you ask what you can do to make Massachusetts stronger and do it; that you don’t let cynicism win, ever -- even when I make mistakes. We didn’t build up this grassroots just to win an election. We built up the grassroots to govern in a whole new way, to make change real, and lasting, and meaningful. And that means, to be sure, that we have to refuse the politics of division and fear “out there.” But it also means some changes “in here,” within the Democratic Party. We have to learn to listen to those who want to help with what’s wrong with Democrats just as openly as we listen to those who tell us what’s wrong with Republicans. See, the grassroots is a power of citizenship. It transcends party, it outlasts party, and it has to lift us all up. And it doesn't end with this election.
In an article in mid-January 2005, the Boston Globe first reported that I was considering getting into this race. I visited my ailing mother that evening to show her the headline. She smiled, kissed me and she said her last good-bye – and then a few hours later, she passed away. We spread her ashes just this morning, Election Day, as a way to mark this milestone in our family’s journey, and to honor her lasting presence in our lives.
She was a remarkable woman. Tough and ornery, and blunt, and opinionated. When we were waiting at the Chicago airport in 1970 when I was 14 years old, as I was about go off alone to Massachusetts for the first time, someone asked her whether she was afraid for me. She said, 'No, he knows he can always come home.'
Nearly 40 years later, Massachusetts is still my home. If I ever had any doubts about that, your support and encouragement and your grace in countless ways over the course of this long campaign has affirmed that for me and for my whole family. What my mother gave me, in that comment, was a confidence about the foundation on which the future is built, and our ability to shape it, and you have strengthened that.
I have told you before that my grandmother used to say, “hope for the best, and work for it.” Well, we have succeeded in raising each others’ hopes, and I can’t wait to get to work.God bless you all. Thank you so much.

Tuesday, November 07, 2006

Extreme Meme

This is a super long meme that I found on Ficken Chinger, which is on top of the Blogs I'm Checking Out list. Fun Fun Fun...


DO YOU SNORE?
Yes, but only when I sleep (sometimes).
ARE YOU A LOVER OR A FIGHTER?
I am a…a…I know, I am a lighter!
WHAT’S YOUR WORST FEAR?
Stroking out.
AS A KID, WERE YOU A LEGO MANIAC?
Yes. In fact, when we went to my Aunt Minnie’s, my brother and I would fight over the legos stored in a large shoe box under the lamp table in her living room.

WHAT DO YOU THINK OF “REALITY” TV?
I live for it.

DO YOU CHEW ON YOUR STRAWS?
No.

WERE YOU A CUTE BABY?
It was the last time I was cute.

IS THE SINGLE LIFE FOR YOU?
Let’s just say that before I was married, the thing I was best at was being single.

WHAT COLOR IS YOUR KEYBOARD?
Black with white letters.

DO YOU SING IN THE SHOWER?
Only when an earworm has infiltrated my noggin.

HAVE YOU EVER BUNGEE JUMPED?
About 15 years ago, me, my buddy Mike and his brother Darren drove to Coney Island because bungee jumping had been spreading like wild fire at that time and there was a fairly new site off the boardwalk, down near the old parachute jump ride. Anyway, we get there and its abandoned…turns out, the day before, there was a bungee death when a band broke in the Midwest and it was run by the same company. So the answer to the question is, no.

ANY SECRET TALENTS
On a blackboard, I can simultaneously write my name forward with my right hand and backward with my left hand.

WHAT’S YOUR IDEAL VACATION SPOT?
I’m a big fan of cruising; I love being out on the sea just vegetating with a snazzy ocean breeze.

CAN YOU SWIM?
No.

HAVE YOU SEEN THE MOVIE DONNIE DARKO?
No.

DO YOU GIVE A DAMN ABOUT THE OZONE?
Yes, though I hate the real heavy duty recycling pricks and "green" scumbags.
HOW MANY LICKS DOES IT TAKE TO GET TO THE CENTER OF A TOOTSIE POP?
Last I counted was more than 25 years ago, but a recall 350 something.

CAN YOU SING THE ALPHABET BACKWARDS?
Yes.

DO YOU PREFER ELECTRIC OR MANUAL PENCIL SHARPENER?
Electric; I actually bought my own just a few years ago.

WHAT’S YOUR STAND ON HUNTING?
I have no interest in it but support those who choose to do it, as long as they do so safely.

IS MARRIAGE IN YOUR FUTURE?
I am currently married.

DO YOU LIKE YOUR HANDWRITING?
Only when I can read it.

WHAT ARE YOU ALLERGIC TO?
Clindamyacin and nice weather (ragweed to be precise).

WHEN WAS THE LAST TIME YOU SAID, “I LOVE YOU” ?
Just minutes ago.

DO YOU CRY AT WEDDINGS?
I have.

HOW DO YOU LIKE YOUR EGGS?
Unfertilized.

ARE BLONDES DUMB?
Only the dumb ones.

WHERE DOES THE OTHER SOCK END UP?
Wherever the cat chooses to hide it.

WHAT TIME IS IT?
8:36pm

DO YOU HAVE A NICKNAME?
No.

IS MCDONALD’S DISGUSTING?
Yes, but that doesn’t take away the occasional craving for a Sausage, Egg, and Cheese McGriddle.

WHEN WAS THE LAST TIME YOU WERE IN A CAR?
About 5:30 this evening.

DO YOU PREFER BATHS OR SHOWERS?
Showers.
IS SANTA CLAUS REAL?
Yes.

DO YOU LIKE TO HAVE YOUR NECK KISSED?
What are you one of them weirdos?

ARE YOU AFRAID OF THE DARK?
No.

WHAT ARE YOU ADDICTED TO?
Chocolate and Reality Television.

CRUNCHY OR CREAMY PEANUT BUTTER?
Crunchy.

CAN YOU CRACK YOUR NECK?
God, No.

HAVE YOU EVER RIDDEN IN AN AMBULANCE?
No.

IS DRUG FREE THE WAY TO BE?
Yes.

ARE YOU A HEAVY SLEEPER?
No.

WHAT COLOR ARE YOUR EYES?
Brown.

DO YOU LIKE YOUR LIFE?
It would be a cop out to say no, but the truth is I am deeply grateful for it.

ARE YOU PSYCHIC?
I was never good at Physics due to dyslexia.

HAVE YOU READ CATCHER IN THE RYE?
Yes, in High School.

DO YOU PLAY ANY INSTRUMENTS?
No. I tried and failed, so I gave up.

HAVE YOU EVER STOLEN MONEY?
Yes, my brother would recklessly dump his loose change on the floor before lapsing into a lengthy coma. I was a poor young boy who just needed a friggin’ candy bar.

CAN YOU SNOWBOARD?
No. There is no logic to snowboarding or skiing.

DO YOU LIKE CAMPING?
I did when I was younger, I wouldn’t do it again. I’ve grown fond of electricity and running water (though not at the same time).

DO YOU SNORT WHEN YOU LAUGH?
No (though it has happened and probably will again).

DO YOU BELIEVE IN MAGIC?
Great song.

ARE DOGS A MAN’S BEST FRIEND?
No, it’s the other way around. Face it, who pays the bills?

YOU BELIEVE IN DIVORCE?
I’ll pass on this…I can’t give a thoughtful intelligent answer in a short enough space.

CAN YOU DO THE MOONWALK?
No. I can do the package grab move at the end of the moonwalk, though it just does not look pretty.

DO YOU MAKE A LOT OF MISTAKES?
Who doesn’t?

IS IT COLD OUTSIDE TODAY?
Not too bad.

WHAT WAS THE LAST THING YOU ATE?
Charlotte Berry Torte with a dollop of Whipped Cream.

DO YOU WEAR NAIL POLISH?
NO.

HOW MANY PEOPLE DO YOU LIKE RIGHT NOW?
Stupid question.
WHAT’S THE MOST ANNOYING TV COMMERCIAL?
Just about all of them except the CITIbank identity theft ones.

DO YOU SHOP AT AMERICAN EAGLE?
I have no idea what that is.

FAVORITE SONG AT THE MOMENT?
Building Bridges by Brooks & Dunn.

Monday, November 06, 2006

The State of Blogging

Egan recently wrote about the state of blogging and how it appears to be fizzing out to a point. It does in fact seem that the larger part of my blogs I frequent list has slowed down to a crawl of late.

I suppose like other "hot" trends and fads, its logical for blogging to fade away in favor of some new thing but I for one refuse to believe that it has to be over. I know that sometimes life gets in the way to the point where the joy of blogging becomes a burden - but if you stick to blogging for the reasons you enjoy it and simply choose not to blog when you're not feeling it, perhaps the burdensome feelings will pass.

I am in the stage of seeking out some fresh new blogs to read as well. While I intend to remain loyal to those who I've come to know, I know that there is a world of wonderful blogs that remains untapped...I',m ready to do some tapping.

In the meantime, the post previous to this was my 500th and I'm on Christmas eve, the blog will be two and a half. I treasure some of the relationships I've formed and the stories I've read.

Until next time, know that I am always thinking about you all - you are a part of me now.

Thursday, November 02, 2006

Reach Around Sue

In honor of my 500th post, and a promise I made in an earlier post, what follows are the results of a moment of creativity brought on by a delicious meatball sub at Papa Gino's this afternoon.

"Reach Around” Sue

Parody of Runaraound Sue as originally perfomed by Dion; a #1 top 40 hit in 1961 (now, just a mockery).

Here's my story sad but true
It's about a girl that I once knew
She likes to go for the reach around
With every other guy in town

I should have known it from the very start
This girl will leave me with a broken heart
Now listen people what I'm telling you
I wish I got one from “Reach Around” Sue

The thought of her pressed against my back
Reachin’ round while nestled in my crack
So if you don’t wanna cry like I do
Go and get one from “Reach Around” Sue

Ohhhh, the thought of her grabbing mine from behind
It just drives me out of my mind
Ah, she likes to reach around, yeah
She'll love you but she'll put you down
People let me put you wise
Sue reaches ‘round with all the other guys

Here's the moral and the story from the guy who knows
She reaches ‘round better than she blows
Ask any fool that she ever knew, they'll say
Keep away from “Reach Around” Sue

Wednesday, November 01, 2006

Growth, Mass, What Have You

A couple of weeks ago I noticed something on my neck that I thought was an insect bite. I realized a few days ago that it was still there and that it is in fact a growth of sorts, not an insect bite.

I called my physician who saw me right away and though it could be one of two things: either a problem with a lymph node (which is scary to me) or a cyst (less scary).

The options given were to just leave it for now yet monitor it for any changes. Or, see a surgeon, remove it, and biopsy it. I asked him what he would do if he were in my shoes (knowing my health history and other assorted neuroses).

So, I'll be consulting with a surgeon on Monday afternoon. Keep me in your thoughts.