Thursday, June 12, 2008

A Funny (now funny) Prostitute Story

Got your attention? Actually this story has always been funny to me but to my buddy, whom we'll refer to as Mike ('cause that's his name), not so much - at least not when it happened.
This was back in the late high school days, we were bored and decided we were going to drive into Manhattan and "check out" the hookers. None of us had any intentions of getting action, we just wanted to observe them (really).
So were cruising the neighborhood and are at a stop light with the windows down. We noticed three hookers trolling the street just ahead and one of them looked our way and I'm guessing saw a car full of young testosterone and came on over.
So this hooker sticks the head right into the car, big ass smile looks around asking who wants the "first ride" of the night and then, reached down and grabbed Mike's package (over his jeans) then looked at him right in the eyes and said something that went sort of like this, "ooh big boy, what do you say you get first crack at this and everyone else can have sloppy seconds."
Before Mike could respond, which would have been difficult given that he fell into a state of shock, Bart (I think it was Bart, it may have ben one of the other guys) noticed that our little miss hooker had an adam's apple the size of Cleveland and yelped, "it's a dude!"
Everyone started laughing in a sort of nervous terror, the windows started going up, the hooker was trying to keep his arm from being severed while maintaining his firm grasp on Mike's peesh, and the car started moving. Once we shook off the terror we all jokingly assured that having a "gay experience" does not necessarily make one "gay" and we ribbed him good for quite some time.
Good times.


David Dust said...

You can't find a good Tranny Hooker in Manhattan anymore. So sad...

Chris said...

David - (great avatar!) - It's all that damn repubican Giuliani's fault!

Joy said...

That's funny - the post and David's comment!

Chris said...

Joy - There's another entertaining prostitute story that involves, of all people, my dad! How's that for a teaser?

Joy said...

Oh my! We have to hear that one!