Friday, August 08, 2008

Finish This Sentence

I saw this on Essentially Me's blog and thought, fun. Turns out it was not so much fun as it was introspective, sometimes in a painful way. Perhaps I needed to do this and running into it wasn't an accident. Either way, here it is:

i am: tired, not just physically.
i think: therefore I am (couldn't resist, thanks Descartes).
i know: there are far too many questions and not nearly enough answers.
i want: to make a difference.
i have: lots of ideas.
i wish: I had the time to play.
i hate: the things that taint the beauty of the world that God created.
i miss: my parents.
i fear: far more than I should.
i feel: like having a large quantity of sushi.
i hear: Brad Paisley, the CD is playing through the computer I am typing on.
i smell: something citrusy.
i crave: the spontaneous energy I once had and am not convinced is gone. Just dormant.
i search: for the answers to all those questions I mentioned previously.
i wonder: sometimes if I really matter to anyone.
i regret: that I actually regret anything.
i love: that I can often find something I feel or think about in almost every song I hear.
i ache: and I wish I didn't.
i care: about you.
i always: wash my hands after using the bathroom.
i am not: always subtle.
i believe: in the power of prayer.
i dance: when I've had a few; actually enough to not realize I am about to dance.
i sing: in the car then try to cover it up when I "get caught" at red lights by making believe I am yawning or talking into a cell phone.
i don't always: think before I speak if I am speaking out of anger.
i fight: the demons of anxiety.
i write: because sometimes it is the only way I can express what I am feeling.
i win: almost never.
i lose: my mind when a student has no idea what their social security number is.
i never: enjoy going to the airport.
i confuse: the confusion in the confusing corner of my world.
i listen: to music because it makes me feel better.
i long: for a peaceful, happy, worry free existence..
i can usually be found: planted in front of a television watching a reality show.
i am scared: of that which frightens me.
i need: to know that I matter to someone other than myself.
i am happy about: the fact that this questionnaire is over, it was far more difficult than it looked when I started.


Chris said...

Joy - Thanks for your thoughtful comment which somehow disppeared...I was able to recover the text almost as mysteriously as it disappeared.

"You definitely matter. I can promise you that. You have touched many lives as a son, sibling, friend, teacher, blogger, and co-worker than you probably even realize. It makes a difference whether you are there in these roles or someone else. Oh yes, you definitely matter, my friend, and would be missed if you weren't here. :-)"

You are one special lady!

Joy said...

That is so odd! The ways of technology are mysterious indeed!

I'm glad you found it because I mean it. And thank you.